"I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell. I know right now you can't tell."
This is going to be it for now. I feel I should make a general warning. From now on, all of my overflows of thoughts that I can't keep inside anymore will be ending up here where they don't take up anyone's time and people can ignore them. I don't want to be selfish more than I can help, so I've decided to quite dumping on people. I'll let this blog catch the overflow, and any readers out there can just ignore it. So there.
Not on an emotional note: I've been teaching myself Russian the past few days. I realized a little under a week ago that Russia and Russian have always fascinated me, and I never realized it. So now I'm making plans to take Russian at uni and make a stop in the lovely country during my visit to Europe. I'm also writing a paper on Russia. And I feel more alive than I have in some time. Learning languages and forming dreams do that for me. It's just a matter of keeping them from getting crushed. Which is why I try not to talk about them in depth. Particularly to certain people. That way, I can keep right on dreaming.
I've also been spending time looking at European street styles and redesigning my look. I wore a new combination of clothes from my closet to classes on Tuesday and got tons of compliments. I felt fantastic all day. I felt like who I want to be and who I am inside. And I felt classy. It was lovely.
I also went to a Bible meeting thingy at my school Tuesday evening. Apparently students from a nearby church meet there every week to have a little service thing. It was kind of nice. The other girls in particular were friendly, and the atmosphere was comfortable. I'm still wary, though. I've had so many bad experiences with church groups that I've become quite the coward. And I'm really curious about some of their theology and beliefs--things that would determine my willingness to stick with it.
I got a new phone recently. It's an android and it's ever so exciting to have it. I feel cool. And it's really handy to have. Especially since my computer battery is corrupted making it impossible to use unless it's plugged in. The phone works as a decent substitute for most things.
School has been going alright. I don't love any of my classes, but I don't hate any of them either. They're all rather easy and boring. I really wish I was taking a foreign language class this year. It would make things much more interesting. At least my English class is decent, though.
Lately I've been rather odd about music. I've been getting randomly sick of certain songs that I typically love, and then I'll just get sick of all music whatsoever. It's very strange for me. I guess I get bored of it. Which would also probably explain my tendency to go for rap/hip-hop and more hardcore music in those moods. Not styles I like much at other times.
Someday soon I'm going to get started on filming stuff. I have an idea for a music video I want to do, and I'm tossing around a couple ideas for a web series or short film. It could be fun. I just wish I had more people to work with and proper equipment. But you do with what you can. C'est la vie.
And I think that's about all. I really do write the lamest blog posts. Maybe they would be better if I actually kept up with it.